Dustin Hoffman

Has Dustin Hoffman ever made a bad movie? Think about it.

I did some investigative reporting and found out that his lowest rated film through a few respectable circles is SPHERE circa 1998. Now I was obviously alive in 1998, and I'm interested in film, and I've never heard of SPHERE. Argo, Sphere doesn't exist - now if you continue to mark off the films Dustin Hoffman has done that I'm not aware of, his lowest rated film by the Rotten Tomatoes standards is Hook, (at an astounding 22%) a fun-filled family action adventure where Robin Williams plays a grown version of Peter Pan opposite Mr. Hoffman as the fictional Captain Hook (hence the title). It may very well be I haven't seen Hook since I was a mere 5 years old, however, this was a classic in the mind of a 5 year old film prodigy and is thus a "fresh tomato" in my book.

Moving forward on a list of the actor's filmography, I don't see one starring Dustin Hoffman that doesn't have or deserve a fresh tomato.

Conclusion: Dustin Hoffman has never made a bad movie.

The Negative Connotation of Water

At a time when I should be writing a paper for my ethics class, I am thinking of water. I just brushed my teeth before bed, a good 5 minutes as I multitasked filling a water bottle full of H2O as I was sure I would be up for awhile longer and it occured to me - water, in and of itself - unflavored and non caffeinated, has a negative connotation in today's society.

I went to the dentist two or three weeks ago and it was revealed to me that I have a cavity... ugh, cavities. Really, too many to name to reveal to the five readers I personally know and the internet readers which I'll never meet but am nonetheless embarrassed. See I like to think I have a generally nice smile... maybe not the best but proportionate in physical terms considering how good the rest of me looks. Joking aside, once I was told of the cavities I decided to drop drinking POP on a dime. I started to drink Diet Green Tea and Water...

It wasn't until the moment when I was brushing my teeth with one hand and filling a water bottle with the other that I realized - had no one ever told me of my cavities, the mind set I used to have would have gone for a Mountain Dew (being sure I would be up for awhile longer) because, very simply put, water is boring. How or when this came into effect is beyond me (with the ancient creation of coffee and our recent innovation of "pop", it's hard to distinguish any timeline to mark a dot with a caption reading, "YEAR X: WATER BECAME BORING".

I even find myself drinking Diet Green Tea more than water simply because of a small taste difference that society explains to you very early on makes a substantial difference.

So screw customs, screw homegrown traditions involving diet, and teach your kids to eat and drink healthy, they can screw up their health once they're old enough to know what endodontic therapy is.

Assassin's Creed

DISNEY'S ALADDIN FOR GROWN ASS MEN.

Raging Bull

I borrowed this to someone. Who is it? I want it back now.